The following was originally sent to the KnitList (knitlist at kniton.com) by Caroline Laudig and appears here with her permission.
—– Original Message —–
Sent: Friday, July 07, 2000
Subject: Knit: Brief Order of Public Confession of My Knitting Sins
I needed a break from all the Minute-and-a-Half summer tops I have been making for my friend, Ms. Minute-and-a-Half, (who is a size 1 adult!!!), so I went sorting through my knitting files. I found my “Brief Order of Public Confession” which Becky Otto and Jeff McKinney and I presented at the Meg Swansen First-Timer Knitting Camp in 1993.
I thought I’d share it here with disclaimers.
I in no way intend to ridicule the Lutheran faith. If you are Lutheran and do not have a sense of humor, stop right now and delete this message.
I in no way intend to ridicule Elizabeth Zimmermann. If you have no sense of her own humor, stop right now and delete this message.
Having said that, I now present my Brief Order of Public Confession of My Knitting Sins:
Father, forgive me:
1. I have purchased yarn beyond my capabilities to knit for the next decade.
2. I have used knitting needles which were not circular.
3. I have mingled unrelated dyelots.
4. I have slavishly followed a commercial pattern without regard to gauge, pattern or shaping.
5. I have twisted threads when I knitted with two colors.
6. I have created a “Wudge” (inadvertently) (You Knitting Campers know what I’m talking about!).
7. I have carried a thread in back for more than five stitches (or one inch).
8. I have stored my woolens in an attic infected with M***s.
9. I have accepted a ((SHEEP)) imitation.
10. I have picked up through ANY convenient loop,
and worst of all,
11. I have taught an innocent child to purl first.
Becky or Jeff, if you’re on this list, drop me a line. I’m as big a sinner now as I was seven years ago!
Caroline’s Culture Ranch, home of the Unruly Wool Room
Copyright © 2000 by Caroline Laudig. All Rights Reserved.
No portion of this document may be copied in any format without the written consent of the copyright holder.